Stories of Love, Freedom & Structures

ভালোবাসা, স্বাধীনতা ও কাঠামোর গল্পসমূহ

A Photovoice Exhibition Exploring Adolescent Sexual and Reproductive Health and Rights

কিশোর-কিশোরীদের যৌন ও প্রজনন স্বাস্থ্য এবং অধিকার অনুসন্ধানে একটি ফটোভয়েস প্রদর্শনী

About our photo exhibition

This exhibition is the result of a 6-month collaboration with youth from Kallyanpur Pora Bosti in Dhaka, the capital of Bangladesh. Through photos, we wanted to explore the lived experiences of youth in the community in relation to child marriage, teen pregnancy and the use of contraceptive methods. Combining the collected photos with focus group discussions, we analyzed the youth’s lived experiences through 3 main storylines. We present some of these photos and quotes from the discussions in this exhibition.

I would like to thank the members of the Youth Advisory Board for their exceptional research work, without whom this exhibition would not have been possible: Airin, Boishakhi, Keya, Puspo, Soborna, Sumaiya, Suvo, Tamanna, Taniya, and Yasin. Of course, I couldn’t have done my fieldwork without the amazing support of research assistants: Ashik, Sam, and Shampa. I would also like to thank the community for welcoming us, my supervisors for their academic and moral support, and IDRC and RRSPQ for their financial support. And of course, a very special thank you to my partner, family, and friends for their unconditional love and for always being my best cheerleaders.

I hope that this exhibition will contribute to amplifying the voices of adolescents, who are too often silenced, regarding issues that concern them directly. I firmly believe that we have a collective responsibility to include them in decision-making, and to create the conditions for their voices to be heard. You can learn more about the priorities for action and recommendations to improve adolescent sexual and reproductive health and rights (ASRHR) in the community here.

Here’s what adolescents have to say.

Stories of Love

Love is an integral part of life, and in adolescence, love can be particularly complex. The Stories of Love identified in our analysis are indeed complex: full of contradictions, ambiguity and pain. Adolescent girls have a strong desire to be loved and fit in their community, while also fighting for their rights and “talking back” to society. They have a lot of hope that things can change. They love their parents, families and children, and they really do love their community – most of them were born and raised in Kallyanpur. However, because they want more agency, they are mobilizing resisting strategies to get their community to change. They are running away from their family with their boyfriends to avoid getting married due to community pressure; they are falsifying their own birth certificates to get married on their own terms with who they want; they are literally talking back in rude ways to potential families in law to avoid getting married.

They resist because they choose to believe in a brighter future. They want to be loved and allowed to experience joy and freedom. They strongly believe that things can change if people are more aware of the consequences of child marriage, they don’t want to keep fighting. While adolescent girls fight for their rights, they also feel bad to do so and they think that they are making “wrong” decisions whenever they go against the system. Despite all the challenges they are facing, they are still willing to fight for love, joy and freedom. However, they need inclusive social structures to better support (and love) them.

“If someone is in a relationship, let them be. Whatever people are saying, we don’t have any benefits to listening to them. We don’t have to be good in front of other people. When listening to people, they will say “We will give you marriage.” This happened to me, that’s why I don’t like it.”

“But families get irritated by listening to people’s comments.”

“Then get irritated. Getting irritated is good.”

— Ria, 16 years old (married) & Anika, 15 years old (not married)

“My mother doesn’t talk that much about my marriage. People are saying to my mother “When will you give marriage to your daughter? Your daughter is now aged, when will you give marriage?” After listening to people, my mother comes home and starts crying. She tells me “For you, I have to listen to people’s words.” Why should I listen to people’s words? […] My mother gets so upset, but people don’t understand that. When these things are told to my mother, my mother breaks down mentally. She thinks “Maybe my daughter is too old now, maybe we should give her marriage, later we won’t get a boy for her.” She feels bad by thinking these things, but my mother puts me into misery by saying these things to me. She is blackmailing me by saying “You aren’t getting married, I will lose my respect for you. Do you want me to lose my respect for you?” I am the person who is going to ruin her respect.”

— Arifa, 18 years old (not married)

Stories of Freedom

Stories of freedom are mostly about loss: of childhood, of dreams, of hope. Girls in the community are getting stuck between being young girls and becoming women, quickly losing their freedom. Child marriage forces them to grow from one to another too quickly, without any support from the community. Their rights are not being recognized and they are facing many inequalities and gender-based violence from their families, partners, and community. Their girlhood is very fragile and no one is protecting them – however, they are expected to protect their own children while still being children themselves. Adolescents, especially girls, are excluded from the community, with no safe place to go and no power to claim and protect their rights. Through child marriage, girls are further being excluded from the community, while also fitting in: they are where they are expected to be. They are losing their rights, childhood, and freedom. Growing up, girls are always on the edge of losing everything.

Many participants have referred to their lives as being imprisoned, comparing families to prison. They are desperate for their freedom. They are hoping their community would let them be young and free, instead of contributing to rumors and pressuring them into marriage. Adolescents are asking to be trusted: they want to be able to explore relationships, to hang out with their friends, to play in a safe community space, to get a good education. They want to be children.

“It is related to child marriage, it is related to health & rights. After a human is born, they get fundamental rights: right to education, right to be free. These rights are not given to girls who are getting married at a young age. She doesn’t have any value of her rights. Her parents are going against her opinion, to save their honor. To get rid of rumors from neighbors, they marry their daughter at a young age. As a result, she can’t move freely. She has to be imprisoned in a small space called family. She can’t go around outside her family. And because of child marriage, she has to have children, she faces physical harm. Her sexual health is harm.”

— Rahim, 16 years old (not married)

“For boys, if they want to go outside to hang out, they can go. They can go with their friends without telling anyone. But a girl can’t go even if she asks her family. When she asks her family, they reply “You don’t have to go, there is no one older with you, you don’t have to hang around with friends.” They say such things. But a girl also wants to hang around, she needs freedom. A girl is never given these kinds of freedoms.”

— Sabrina, 15 years old (not married)

Stories of Structures

Many societal structures are failing youth. The Stories of Structures are exploring political, economic, cultural and social structures that are unfair to youth. There is a lack of ASRHR awareness in the community that is stemming from a broken, complex system. The education system is not teaching anything on ASRHR: most adolescents rely on their family and friends to gain more knowledge. However, the social system doesn’t support this and people are not comfortable discussing these issues. This leads to a collective lack of ASRHR knowledge and a lot of misconceptions, and it is difficult for youth to find reliable information. The lack of overall ASRHR awareness in the community contributes to the social acceptability of hurtful practices like child marriage. Community pressure and social norms are not being questioned. Everyone wants to fit in and be part of the community, and to do so, corruption occurs to facilitate practices like child marriage. Laws about child marriage are rarely enforced and adults are not accountable for their actions.

It is very hard to question a system that is being idealized by most of the community. However, societal structures, including community and social norms, are failing youth, and there are very important consequences on adolescent health. Girls who are married too young are facing malnutrition, depression, pregnancy complications, maternal and newborn deaths.

The structures of the community should be more supportive and inclusive of adolescents. Fostering youth-friendly structures can support the development of the community and ensure a brighter future for everyone.

“If we go to protest in the front, we don’t have anyone as shield in the back. Do you understand? […] There is no one to help us, they will say “You guys go ahead, we are there to support in the back.” The child marriages that happen, if we want, we can go and stop that. But we don’t have anyone to support us. If we go alone to stop that, then our family will face consequences.”

— Tahmina, 15 years old (not married)

“Child marriage is happening to avoid the harsh words of community people. I mean, generally, any girl gets into a relationship. When people of the area know that this is happening, they put pressure on her family. They say to the family “Your daughter has done things with that boy“, “She will run away“. […] They put pressure on the family, and family can’t endure that pressure, so they give child marriage to the girl. And there is also mental pressure on the girl, as people in the community are saying things about her. She can’t endure that and doesn’t want to speak over her parents, that’s why she does the child marriage.”

— Sultana, 16 years old (not married)