Growing up, Waterloo-based mother and company founder Wanda Deschamps knew she wasn’t like most of her peers.
“I felt different and I didn’t know why,” she said.
Aside from not having the same interests as kids her age, Deschamps remembers having difficulty connecting with others. She would often struggle to find the right words to match concepts, which often led to misunderstandings and conflict in her relationships.
“I was working hard to fit in, to copy the behaviour that I viewed as acceptable and at the same time I was being criticized,” she said adding, “I existed in this very confused state.”
Others didn’t see the invisible and internal struggles Deschamps was going through.
And her struggles became even more heightened as an adult at work.
In 2017, it all became too much for her to handle. “I had a complete breakdown at work on May 12, 2017,” she recalls.
After seeking help for her mental health and taking her son to a specialist for an evaluation, Deschamps, then aged 46, finally decided to find answers.
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“I said I’d like my own psychological assessment. I think I’m autistic as well,” she remembers telling the specialist.
In July 2017, she received her autism diagnosis.
“Receiving my diagnosis was like picking up a missing piece of my brain, putting it in place and feeling whole for the first time.”
And it was then that Deschamps began to look at everything through a new prism. “I had been bullied and harassed starting in childhood and I blamed myself. (After my diagnosis) I realized not everything was my fault,” she said.
In 2019, she started Liberty Co, a consulting company that helps organizations increase the participation of neurodiverse people in the workforce.
GIRLS AND UNDIAGNOSED AUTISM
Like Deschamps, many others go into their adulthood struggling internally not knowing they are on the spectrum. According to Autism Ontario, there are “approximately 135,000 autistic people in Ontario” and in Canada, one to two per cent of the population are on the autism spectrum.
“Autism is a spectrum disorder,” said Nichole Scheerer, assistant professor in the psychology department at Wilfrid Laurier University. As such, “there is a huge variability in how autism presents in different individuals,” she added.
For people that don’t show stereotypical signs, it may be overlooked, she explained.
Scheerer, whose research focuses on autism, believes there are many factors that can cause a delay in diagnosis. This includes a person’s access to trained doctors and the parent’s knowledge about autism among others.
She also says a person’s sex can influence the delay in diagnosis.
“Diagnoses are often overlooked in females,” she said.
According to a report by the Public Health Agency of Canada, males are diagnosed approximately four times more frequently than females.
“(This could be because) the diagnostic criteria for autism was originally based on the observation of autistic males,” Scheerer shared. The first scientist to describe autism in detail based his study on observations on many autistic males, she explained. “This may have introduced some biases into the diagnostic criteria.”
Autism also often co-occurs with other neurodevelopmental and mental health conditions. “As a result, autism can sometimes be overlooked if another diagnosis occurs first.”
Scheerer said, like Deschamps, many women go undiagnosed for years. This often happens because females on the spectrum more often internalize their struggles. “They keep things inside, become quiet, shut down,” said Scheerer. While males on the other hand often tend to externalize, they “throw tantrums or have behavioural meltdowns.”
And so, “females with undiagnosed autism may develop anxiety, depression or low self-esteems as a result of their struggles,” she shared.
They also tend to camouflage or mask their autism more. Camouflaging, she explains, is adapting behaviours in social settings in an attempt to hide less socially acceptable behaviours. “Since the autistic person is camouflaging their autism, some signs may be missed.”
YOU CAN GET DIAGNOSED AT ANY POINT IN YOUR LIFE
People who may be struggling, feel like they may be on the spectrum and those who are dealing with mental health challenges like depression or anxiety shouldn’t hesitate to reach out to health professionals, Deschamps said.
“One of the reasons I share my story, is for other people to know that you can get diagnosed at any point in your life,” she added.
And for families with loved ones on the spectrum, one way to embrace neurodiversity, according to Deschamps, is to make sure there is unconditional love at home.
“Having a different brain make up can be tiring (because of) the efforts around communication and trying to fit in. The home should be a place to relax and be themselves.”
Home should be a place where people know they’ll always be accepted for themselves, she said.
Families or individuals who need support can reach out to Autism Ontario.
